Posts tagged ‘Facebook’

September 15, 2013

SOME OF MY FACEBOOK ‘FRIENDS’ ARE CRIMINALS

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This is true according to the subject line of repeated spam emails I receive in my Yahoo account.

Yahoo’s spam blocker needs a major overhaul; it’s as efficient as Congress.   Perhaps, also like Congress, it has sold itself, and therefore you, out to special interests that wish to profit on your many emotions and, in some cases, bring about technological angina.  Meanwhile, Yahoo yells yahoo all the way to the bank.

The folks at SECURELIST.com, a cyber comfy site published by the Kaspersky security software folks, say that “70-80% of all email traffic is spam.”  CampaignMonitor.com says that nearly 10% of all email accounts are owned by Yahoo.  So how long does it take to ride the train from New York to Atlanta?

Obviously, this garbage, like most advertising and politics, is effective because there are those who swallow it as being legitimate; people click and open this shit.  You are the fish and the spam is the fisherman dangling the hook with a rubber worm.  In Lake Yahoo, the fisherman seeks to hook you with the lure of money, sex, and in one case, a product to download which will prevent you from getting spam…like this one.

Apparently I’ve won the Irish Lottery…a number of times.  I have a secret benefactor in Nigeria that would like to give me a million dollars; I just have to email him my bank account information.  Apparently I’ve been voting early and often as both Democrats and Republicans have been emailing me, thanking me for my vote.  To some I have erection issues (not of the World Trade Center Memorial variety) while others, most likely tramps rejected from GoDaddy.com, like my pictures and would like to meet; apparently I have nice hands.

Like epitaphs on gravestones, some of these are hilarious.

I long ago switched to Outlook as my main email provider; their lookout for spam has been, in my experience, much better than those employed at Yahoo.

So, while some of my Facebook ‘friends’ may be Democrats, I doubt any of them are criminals.

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June 23, 2013

Facebook Needs a ‘Thumbs Down’ Icon

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Society has been Oprah-nized.

The new social paradigm states that we must be accepting of all and to all we must have faith that if they are number than a pounded thumb, God and a great big hug will heal them.

I say give ‘em a kick in the ass and tell ‘em to smarten the hell up.

We have to be more sensitive to the hyper-sensitive; it is our responsibility to help the irresponsible; we must be positive toward the negative; and “red is gray and yellow white.”

OH, HOW I LOVE YOU!!!   

Give me a freakin’ break, already.

Every back-asswards behavior is analyzed as an addiction, given a cute little acronym, or excused due to some historical trauma.

Back in the day the only label that was relevant was Black Label.

Squeezing into this global group hug is Facebook.

Right away you are told to “accept” some digital stranger to be a “friend.”  Your husband or wife is waiting in the bedroom for you and you’re online trading cute little kitty photos with someone who may be a member of Al-Qaeda.

I apologize to all my Al-Qaeda “friends;”  I suppose they’re capable of having an affinity for the furry little bastards.

So you are in this little Facebook community and you got the News Feed thing cranked up and all these “friends” are “sharing” some pretty lame shit.

I mean, is it necessary to let your group of “friends” know that you have to take a break because your one year-old just burped up his strained peas?  “Oh, how cute! “

Cute my ass (this is what the kid is thinking, not me).

Now, if the little shit jumps up, grabs the Gibson and rips off some Kashmir, post that sucker!

The point is that we are, as civilized members of the Facebook community, socialized to accept all “shared” communiqué from what is in some cases a list of thousands of “friends.”

Facebook protocol does not allow you to designate the posting of “friend” as being a total piece of crap. But you can push the hell out of that ‘thumbs up’ icon all day long. 

Yes, you could just fill in the comment section of the egregious post with a…few choice words, however, the social engineering behind Facebook tells us that it is not nice to diss your “friends.”

In the days of our youth, when our flesh and blood “friends” said or did something only a mother could smile at, it was quite normal to call them a dumb fuck.

Not now.  Now we just give that little fake Nancy Pelosi smile and let it stand.

It was once considered helpful, and necessary, to let your “friends” know that what they are doing could be the manifestation of incurable liberalism – no, I’m kidding, that just came so natural I had to leave it in – seriously, tough love and constructive criticism was once seen as a positive, nurturing, blessed thing to show toward a “friend.”

So if you tell me that this sucked, it’s ok, I’ll grow.

Oh Lord.